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I've been having a hard time lately.
Feeling guilty about how I've been acting.
Feeling like shit because I'm having issues with being depressed still.
Everyday is a struggle.
Especially lately.
I just feel like I'm missing something in my life.
I don't know what it is.
I feel like buying and playing games has helped in the past.
It's not working lately.
I can't quite put my finger on what's not working in my life.
Honestly, I have it pretty good.
I have a full time job that isn't so bad.
This full time job lets me have a place to live and food to eat.
Because I can do these things I can spend a little time doing stuff I really enjoy, like streaming and making artwork.
Because I do my stream and artwork I should feel happy.
I think because I'm in between the part of starting and not being a success at these things I might be feeling like I made a bad choice?
This cycle of wake up, go to work, get home, do work on personal stuff, go to sleep, rinse repeat might be a thing that's messing me up.
I know I'm lonely. I realized lately when talking to a new friend that I might be overbearing. I really need to take my self back a bit and just really figure out who the fuck I am and what I'm looking for in life.
I seem to have lost sight of goals recently, which I have a big goal.
I have a spot at a table in Tucson Comic Con.
I will be there sharing my artwork and stuff with the locals, in hopes to network with people who are just like me.
I have another huge goal, a successful Twitch.tv stream.
This is something I've been taking very serious lately and I feel like I'm seeing the fruits of my labor.
I need to network more with streamers though, so the hosting / sharing is more successful.

I'm just not happy with the little I have. And I feel selfish and stupid about it. I guess I was expecting more from myself. But I need to work harder.
You reap what you sow.